Making Logic Work to Our Advantage

Marisa has always been extremely fashion conscious, so when she was 16, she decided that it was much more fashionable to have straight hair. I helped her to achieve her goal by teaching her to dry her hair with a hairdryer and then follow up with a flat iron. Marisa was so excited to be able to achieve the smooth and straight hair style she had been longing for. This styling technique continued over the next two years, and then I started to notice that Marisa's hair was breaking, splitting, thinning and becoming very dried out. It just wasn't looking very silky and healthy any more. So it was time to make a change, but this was not going to come about quickly or easily.

I had switched my own straight hair style to a natural and curly look. From years of blow drying and flat ironing, I noticed my hair had also lost it's sheen and had become extremely dry. I started to learn the proper way to care for naturally curly hair and worked at perfecting my new hair care regime.

Unfortunately, teenagers usually are not interested in following the example that their parents set for them. They prefer to emulate the styles of peers or celebrities in their age group. I knew that I had a difficult task ahead of me. I was faced with a very real challenge, not just because Marisa is a teenager but because of her autism. I knew that the best approach would be from a logical standpoint, because when it comes to autism, problems are best resolved through the use of logic. People on the autism spectrum see things differently than us neuro-typicals, and when I think about it, the way Marisa sees things usually does make sense. I have a great deal of respect for Marisa's way of thinking, because when she explains why she does so many things differently than I would, it always seems to make sense. That is why I knew that if I could approach Marisa with a logical reason why it would be good for her to switch her hair routine, I would have a good chance of succeeding.

I set out by explaining the problems that arose from straightening her hair. By viewing the ends of her hair in the mirror and comparing it to the hair near her scalp, it was plain to see a very real difference. The hair near the scalp had a silky shine, and the hair near the ends was thin, dry and dull. Marisa was able to make the comparison for herself and was not happy with what she saw, but this was not enough to convince her.

I explained to Marisa that we needed to trim off the damaged ends. I would need to do this periodically till the hair would once again appear healthy and strong. Marisa could see for herself, how damaged the hair ends were as I cut them away. Once the damaged ends were cut away, she could see and feel how much thicker the hair was.

Next I searched for pictures of all the pop stars Marisa admired and here too, we were able to find quite a few that she could emulate. So I figured I had it made, but not quite yet. Marisa was still insisting that she needed to straighten her hair for school, but agreed to go natural for the summer while at camp. Well, at least it was a step in the right direction.

It's been three years since I started to push in the direction of this change over to natural curls. Marisa is wearing her hair curly most of the time now, but last spring and summer, still seemed to think she needed to straighten her hair for parties and proms at school and camp. Then recently, I smiled to myself when I noticed Marisa on the computer checking out some hair products for curly hair. When picture day at school arrived, Marisa walked in to the kitchen dressed in all her glory from head to toe in bling as she always did for picture day. One thing was different this time. Marisa was sporting a natural curly hair style! My heart skipped a beat, and I smiled as I joyfully told her, "You're picture perfect today!"